It takes a village to raise a child

 The saying that has been around for centuries; an ancient African proverb that continues to resonate with succeeding generations. So what does it actually mean? While it may seem pretty straight forward, there is more to this phrase than just community members looking after a child. 

In short, the expression refers to an entire community working together to ensure the growth and safety of children. While the members of our immediate family do shape our values, beliefs, and personalities, the people that surround us (our environment), have a noteworthy impact on our overall development.

First things first–“it takes a village to raise a child” does not mean that the (metaphorical) village is responsible for raising your child. It means the community is responsible for looking after the child. To put it more clearly– making sure they learn important life lessons, such as respecting their elders and demonstrating proper manners. Yet, respect isn’t one-sided. The members of the community must also listen to the children so that they feel heard and appreciated. In a village, a child feels safe.

In our fast-paced, alienated society, it is somewhat surreal to grasp that there are indeed cultures around the globe that value community instead of individualism. Civilizations exist that emphasize collective needs including taking care of families and “looking out” for each other. In these places, the act of living and growing is an experience in which all members participate. So, let’s say a child is being deprived of learning how to read or write due to the fact that the parents are too busy with work or house chores. In such a scenario, members of the “village” would step in to teach the child in the absence of the parents.

This kind of solidarity seems like a far-reaching, utopian concept– especially in today’s WESTERNIZED culture. As mentioned above, there’s no doubt times have drastically changed. We live in a world where we are constantly inundated by information, cell phones replace people, and although the population continues to grow, our social interactions decline.

Could it have something to do with the fact that the United States is termed an individualistic culture? Yes–the definition is pretty much exactly what you think it is: our culture is focused more on self-growth and independence than community. The opposite end of the spectrum would be a collectivist culture, in which family and group goals take precedence. Why bring this up, you ask? Well, not surprisingly, the saying “it takes a village to raise a child” tends to be more widely received in collectivist cultures.

As you can see, the “village” represents the overall environment in which a child grows up in. A supportive, nurturing community fosters growth by instilling values that ultimately mold characteristics, beliefs, and behavior. A child who grew up witnessing their parents act generously towards neighbors are more likely to replicate that kind of behavior in the future. The same concept goes for trusting others, saying please and thank you, being charitable; these are all values that we learn from a young age.

That being said, it’s safe to say we are at a time where we could use a “village” more than ever. Our society has grown increasingly stressful, with more incidences of child bullying, isolation, and a spike in mental disorders–which is why this proverbial saying is so important. It takes a village to educate our children about the dangers of drinking and driving, it takes a village to ensure the safety of our children at playgrounds, with neighboring parents keeping an eye out on all the kids.

It takes a village to have difficult conversations about drugs and other potential threats they might encounter. A school, for example, is a village in itself. Teachers are responsible for the safety, education, and growth of children; they prepare them for the outside world and equip them with the knowledge needed to make smart decisions about their future.

It’s true, you cannot always control what a child will choose to listen to,  but that does not mean you can’t try.  HEALTHY WEALTH ADVICE, we believe in the power of education through effective communication. While we may not have a village looking after our kids, we can start right at home with the family.

This African saying is believed to originate from the Igbo and Yoruba people of Nigeria. But, the idea that ‘it takes a whole village to raise a child’ is fundamental to many African cultures. So what exactly does it mean, and why does it have a positive impact on the child’s development?

The main idea behind the saying is that it takes a whole community, and not just two parents, to bring up a child. The extended family have an important role to play. For example, a child often spends extended periods of time under the care of their grandparents, aunties, or uncles. Cousins and siblings also act as role models to their younger family members.

CHILDREN ARE A BLESSING

This philosophy is closely linked with the African belief that children are a blessing. The entire community is delighted whenever a child is born, so everyone would like to take responsibility for their upbringing.

The principle that a whole village should contribute to raising a child has many advantages. Firstly, it is psychologically proven that a child benefits from having multiple role models. Also, with family, friends, and neighbours looking after them, the child is able to thrive in a secure and loving environment. The safety net provided by the community enables them to explore and learn without coming to harm.

Secondly, pressure is taken off the parents. Mothers and fathers have one of the most difficult jobs in the world. They work 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year, and nobody pays them for it. If the entire community takes part in raising their child, then the parents will feel less isolated, less stressed, and therefore happier. If the parent is happy, then so is the child.

Thirdly, this philosophy brings the whole community together, building trust between its members. It teaches us that we need each other, and so we have to learn to get along, forgiving each other if we make mistakes. The child also learns to love his community, and look out for his family, friends and neighbours.

THE INFLUENCE OF AFRICAN PHILOSOPHY ON THE WEST

This African philosophy is so respected, that it has had a profound influence on Western culture. In Australia, mothers have used it to set up ‘street gangs’, where neighbours work together to raise their children, taking it in turns to take them to school and cook meals. This enables mothers to have a career, while looking after their children. Hilary Clinton, the candidate for the Democratic party in the US presidential election, has also published a book under the title It takes a village.

In the West, it is uncommon to be friendly with our neighbours. We often feel isolated, and that we could do with a stronger community spirit. Thus we can learn from the African philosophy that ‘it takes a whole village to raise a child.’